The Celebration of Dolores life.

27.07.1945 to 23.10.2007

The Tecoma Pavilion
Royal Botanical Gardens
South Yarra

Celebrant

Beautiful Loli, we love you, our hearts have been touched by your unending love for us. A heart so genuine, a heart so loving. A wonderful friend, a special mother, a loving wife and a grandmother.

You made us laugh, you held our hands, gave us guidance and all your love.

We shall miss you. You have given us so much, how grateful we are to have been given a place in your life. Yet, your touch remains in everything you have loved, and lives within us, and through us. May your gifts continue to grow, through your children, family and friends.


Celebrant

May I welcome you to this ceremony today, to celebrate Loli's life. May we join with one heart to farewell Loli an adored wife, mother, sister, daughter, and a genuine friend.

My name is Lea Rose I am a civil celebrant today on behalf of Loli's family I thank you for your love and support which has been expressed in many thoughtful ways. I particularly offer love and support to Loli's husband Jose, may he be held in loving support by this wonderful community.

On behalf of Loli donations are welcomed to The Peter MacCallum Cancer Centre, we have a box set up on the table. Peter Mac became a very important part of Loli's life.

As a volunteer herself, she was totally devoted and always felt it was her duty. Loli had the utmost respect and admiration for all those involved at Peter Mac and the amazing service it provides, so it only seems natural to ask her friends and family to continue that support by donating to a worthy and significant cause.

Sequence

Loli's life history

Celebrant

I now ask close friends Fabian and Rod to come forward, and share their words about 'our friend Loli'.

Loli – Magnifico Compañero

Born in Madrid to a film make-up artist dad and hair-dresser/wig maker mum.

2 brothers and 2 sisters.

1n 1962 brother Jose had an army friend, Jose, who was studying to be a doctor but was fascinated by the work his friend did as a film make-up artist.

A fascination that showed no signs of diminishing after meeting little sister Loli.

Jose was permitted to come and help out on location for the film "55 Days In Peking" and Jose fell in love with the film make-up profession and Loli at the same time.

In 1965 Jose came out to Australia to work for the Elizabeth Arden salon in Melbourne and six months later, when she had attained the legal age of 21, Loli joined Jose and Australia and they were married.

Soon after they established their first business together, a hair salon in Lt Collins St specializing in wigs and hair-pieces which were all the rage in the 60's.

But Loli, showing signs of what was later to become at Peter Mac her charitable calling, would spend all her attention on helping the poor women who came into the salon with no hair at all – ironically mostly due to their own illnesses.

In 1969 Carmen was born and Jose and Loli thought it was time for a larger premises so they found a place above Oggs Chemist in Toorak Rd Sth Yarra which became for the next couple of decades their fashionable Spanish style salon.

And during this period they found time to work on numerous feature films together, maintain a healthy tennis schedule and have another daughter, Blanca.

In 1987, Loli was given devastating news. She had advanced cancer in the lung and an immediate pneumonectomy was needed.

It was a life threatening situation and there was not a lot of hope according to the doctors

She fought quietly but determinedly and showed the medical establishment who was boss and quickly recovered to resume her hair-dressing and film career.

It was six months later they told Loli that she had secondary cancer in the cerebellum and again immediate surgery was needed.

Again she fought quietly but determinedly and after this surgery and a course of radio therapy, Loli went into remission.

She beat the odds 20 years ago and Loli was rewarded beyond her most precious dreams by seeing their two beautiful daughters Carmen and Blanca grow up, and then getting to know three beautiful grandchildren, Jared, Payton and Cassia.

That precious time also gave the Peter Macallum Cancer Clinic a relationship with her that endured for 15 years. Loli went every single Tuesday for fifteen years as a volunteer to do the hair of patients in the wards.

For the last 11 months Peter Mac gave Loli the love and attention that she gave them for so many years. Thankyou.


Celebrant

I now ask Blanca to come forward and share her words ~, "Our Mum"


Our Mum

She was a loving compañera, a wise and wonderful Mami,
The best and coolest friend…you could have there always,
She was my mum.

Her words were often that,
"Although I am positive in mind and strong, I am above all and beyond, very very lucky". To her, luck was something given to us, by a gift of a life and the sound of a bird, the growth of a flower, and she made me feel very very lucky to be a big part of her life.

To lose all these special gifts in such an amazing person. Is hard to ever accept. However, it would be her happiness to see and to be remembered by her beautiful smile, her great sense of humor and her precious little ways that she gave to so many individual’s lives each and every day. Her conversations, and lets not forget her crazy Gypsy call of the grito ...when she felt enormous energy around her, she would do the call as a celebration to life on earth!

One of the last things she spoke to me about, in hospital was, she wrote it down because in her last days she was unable to talk, which she loved to do so much of, she said very frankly, matter-of-factly to me "It is a shame I can not talk, but I am not sad", I can see now she wanted only for us to grieve in happiness!

My Mum's favorite motto in life, from my memories growing up were; "Manaana sera otro dia" Tomorrow will be another day! She wanted to help me to begin something each day and enjoy the fruits of my labor by completing it wholeheartedly, this way she showed me strength to never give up. Mami will be smiling back at us each and every day! You're the Mami most perfect that I could have ever imagined!


Celebrant

I now ask Anne from the volunteer department at Peter MacCallum hospital to come forward and share her words ~"Our colleague".


Our Colleague

Thank you to Jose, Carmen and Blanca for inviting me to speak about Loli on behalf of Peter Mac Volunteer Services.

Loli came to Peter Mac on the suggestion of her good friend Liz and joined the Volunteer Service in April 1991. She wanted to put her wig making and hairdressing skills to good use for patients. It was believed that Loli's professional skills would be a great asset for Peter Mac, as well as her experience of dealing with her own cancer which would be a great boost for patients. Loli successfully combined both.

By 1996, Loli decided Tuesday would be her day to volunteer, much to the delight of the "Tuesday" group, and you always knew when Loli arrived at the volunteer rooms as there were hugs and kisses for all. She could light up a room with her smile and also wake up a room with her Spanish yodeling!!! She had a wonderful rapport with the other volunteers as well as with patients and staff and just seeing her lovely brightly colored clothes and the biggest of smiles seemed to brighten everyone up when she entered a room.

Loli had a great sense of when to be compassionate and when to use her wacky humor and turn of phrase to engage with people. As with most people working at Peter Mac, she often struggled to keep her emotions in check whilst alongside patients and their family. She was very aware of the importance of returning to the Volunteer rooms and sharing what had happened to her.

Heather Ingram remembers how Loli always spent time in the Chapel, as her faith was a great source of comfort to her. Loli also loved to visit the Auxiliary shop, and on special days when everyone would bring in something to share for lunch, Loli's Spanish omelet was a great favorite!!

With Loli there was no prevarication, one always knew what she meant. No saint, but Loli was a truly beautiful, honest and loving person. She had such a passion for life and a positive attitude about everything she did. As Sue Breen stated, honesty was another of Loli's great attributes. Sue said "She often told me how bad my hair looked and how she could improve it. You could never take offense because she was usually right".

Loli, Carla Reid and Mimma Fedele were right - your friendship and hospitality were always present – you cared for us as we also cared for you. Your love of all things beautiful and meaningful was displayed in the careful placement of all treasures in your home. Love and care was always around.

Loli was a nurturer, her treasures, her friends and family, she was big enough to take on all of that and more.

A source of great joy and pleasure to Loli has been her beautiful grandchildren and she delighted in regaling others with stories about them. Her grandchildren added an unprecedented richness to her life and bless them for that.

Loli has been a vibrant and dedicated volunteer hairdresser at Peter Mac for 16 years and she will be remembered by us as a wise, gentle and caring soul, with a quiet strength and determination, which she displayed so strongly in the past few months as she bravely battled her illness with such a positive spirit. How fitting that her "Tuesday" girls were in when we heard the news of Loli's passing.

We will miss your lovely smile and that mischievous glint in your eye Loli, you made us laugh and cry. Loli – a woman of dignity, compassion and fun.


Celebrant

Words entitled "The Love Loli shared" will now be spoken by her daughter Carmen about the love between Loli and Jose.


The Love Loli Shared

First of all, on behalf of my father Jose, my sister Blanca and I, I would like to thank everyone for being here today. We are overwhelmed with your compassion, love and support and feel incredibly lucky to have such beautiful people in our lives.

My Mum was an extraordinary woman. I am certain that everyone here today will agree that they have felt and received love in some way, shape or form from Loli. This was so natural for her to do and she gave love generously. Maybe that's why it was so easy to love her back.

She was an incredible mother. A patient teacher who carefully and effortlessly gave us lessons without the hardship. A nurturing healer who always knew how to kiss it better when it hurt. A loving parent who always understood the complexities of growing up. A wise soul who shared her knowledge without force. An honest guide who supported and encouraged and made you believe in yourself. And a funny lady who knew how to enjoy life and have a good laugh. She was my beautiful Mami.

Although I was fortunate enough to experience her motherly love, unconditional love and the love of a true friend – what I really want to touch on is the love that I witnessed and was exposed to – the love between my parents. This is the greatest love story of all time.

Their love for each other simply cannot be compared to anything else. It was your classical tale of "love at first sight" – but only from my father's point of view. According to Mum, Dad didn't look so great with an army haircut and protruding ears! Luckily his charm and wit did the trick. Knowing my father, his hypnotic endless chatter would have certainly lured her in as well. So began a beautiful relationship in Spain in 1961.

Their love took them across to the other side of the world to Australia where they started their new lives. Love multiplied and eventually Blanca and I made 4.

As many of you know, my parents were like 2 love birds and openly displayed affection towards each other and subsequently towards us too. Mum would always say that their love was so strong and passionate because Dad would spend a lot of time away from home whilst working and so the distance made the heart grow fonder. She claimed it was good for their relationship – which I don't doubt. I also believe that real love outlives and survives anything and everything.

The love between my parents lay the foundations for my whole upbringing. My parents taught me to dance with the one you love like no-one is watching. They taught me to kiss the one you love whenever there is an opportunity. They taught me to hold hands with the one you love just because it feels great. They taught me to say "I love you" because it makes your heart beat and fuels the soul. And most of all they taught me that real love has no expiry date.

My parents' love is one that touched everyone. Their love was inspiring, magical, unique, pure and powerful. It was infectious and breathtaking. It made me feel safe and warm, fortunate and whole.

If only but a handful of people loved the way my parents loved each other, this world would be a much happier place. Now this world has lost one of the best, most loving people of all– but I promise that we will continue to share and multiply that love that Loli gave.


Celebrant

Loli's grandsons Payton and Jarris will now come forward and share words entitled "Our Nana".


Payton
Loli was my favorite grandma.
And I have three of them.
I called her Nana.
I loved her always.
When I found out she had cancer I was sad.
and I felt sorry for my grandfather.
I call him Dada.

She spent so much time with me;
movies, board games, fun and most of all she loved Harry Potter very much.
And so do I.

We didn't get to watch the fifth Harry Potter movie together,
but we got to read the books which was even better

She bought me a really cool analog watch that I like to wear a lot.

Nana stays with me all the time in my heart.

I am going to miss her very much.

Jarris
I love Nana so much.
I hope she has a good time in heaven.


Herb of Remberance

Loli loved to garden. This was truly a place of peace for her, where she connected with nature. That is why we are here today The Botanical Gardens ~ one of her most favorite places.

In honor to her connection with nature, and her life, we have for those that want to take with them, some 'Rosemary' the herb of remembrance.


Reflection/ prayer

I now ask everyone to observe a minute's silence. And take this opportunity to offer your prays and blessings to Loli, and to reflect on the meaning that Loli's life had for you.

1 min silence.


Poem

I now ask Carla (close family friend) to come forward and read a poem written together with her mother Tessa

I want to tell everyone why I loved you
I want them to know about the grace in your step
I want to shout to the world the strength of your pride
And my admiration from the day that we met

Loli, you were magical
You taught us about life in every breath
You are the survivor in this tale of loss
You are the courage we all need ahead
It’s moments like these I can feel you
I feel you giving us strength
I want to thank you for the life we enjoyed
I want to thank you for being my friend

We give you the wings to be what you want
We give you the wings to go where you like
Fly to the sun, follow the wind
And kiss the moon we danced at night

Be whimsical and fanciful
Rest by the rivers and swim in the dark
Live all the dreams we talked about
Travel to Spain and take a ride on the stars

We'll take care of Jose and your girls
We'll be as beautiful as you are and make you proud
Until the day we shall all meet again…with an "ay ay ay ay ay ay ay ay"
We'll follow the wind, kiss the moon and see you around.

We love you.
Carla & Tessa


The Committal

Loli's ashes will be scattered by the immediate family over the ocean along with her treasure chest of personal belongings, letters from her grandchildren and rose petals.

Back to the elements, fire, earth, water, and air. Back to mother nature from which all life comes, and to which all life returns. We can know that nothing that is loved is ever lost.

And no-one who has ever touched a heart can really pass.
Because beauty lingers on in each memory of which Loli has been a part of.

We give thanks to her life, we remember with gratitude her generous heart and loving nature.


23rd psalm. I did not die.

DO NOT STAND AT MY GRAVE AND WEEP.
I AM NOT THERE, I DO NOT SLEEP.
I AM A THOUSAND WINDS THAT BLOW,
I AM THE DIAMOND GLINTS ON SNOW,
I AM THE SUNLIT-RIPENED GRAIN,
I AM THE GENTLE WINTER RAIN.

WHEN YOU AWAKE IN THE MORNING HUSH,
I AM THE SWIFT, UPLIFTING RUSH
OF QUIET BIRDS IN CIRCLED FLIGHT,
I AM THE STARS THAT SHINE AT NIGHT.

DO NOT STAND AT MY GRAVE AND CRY.
I AM NOT THERE.
I DID NOT DIE.


Celebrant

I thank you all for coming, and for your love and support, please join in singing Halleluiah with Fabian.


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